Usually, after hitting an evening so hard I need a couple of days to recuperate. I only got 3 hours of sleep the night before as I went to bed at 7:30am and woke up at 10:45 am. It is difficult to sleep in at the guesthouses as it gets too hot to sleep after 9:30 or so. There would be no rest for the weary today. I got a text message from my friend Ann telling me she would pick me up at 9:30 at Kho San road. I spent the day in pretty much misery, as I was really hung-over. That is the problem with getting so drunk while vacationing. You end up pretty much losing a day.
I did walk around the city a little bit. Most guesthouses and hotels make you drop the key off every time you leave the premises. This is nice because it is one less thing to worry about. At the one I am staying at now the girl told me you keep the key. Unfortunately, I have new shorts and the pockets are not deep enough and the key fell out in my taxi. I was freaking out because at the London hotel there was a sign that said 1500 baht for losing the key. This is around $40. There was no way I was going to pay this. When I got back to the place I told the girl at the front desk that I locked myself in. A lady followed me up to my room and she unlocked the door. My strategy was to tell them this first so I at least I had access to my things, then I would tell them that I lost it. If they hit me with a big charge I would have told them I want to look in my room a little more for the key. Then I would go up and pack and leave. They were really nice and just gave me a new key and chastised me for taking the key out. I told them I was told that we keep it. I think the girl messed up her pronouns. She told me “you keep the key,” but I think she meant we keep the key. I told the girl that, and she said since her friend told me that they would not charge me. I thanked her and was relieved that I did not have to pay this charge.
I then went to eat and again walked past the placards of all the missing people from the tsunami. The first picture I looked at was an 8month old boy. Being sufficiently depressed I put in a donation into the box there and headed to dinner. I had dinner and still felt terrible. I went back to my room and sat in the fetal position for about an hour in my little prison cell and then went down to the cafe in the front and had two banana shakes. If my liver ever fails, and I cannot drink anymore, I am going to move to Thailand and drink fruit shakes until whatever organ it is that processes fruit shakes fails. Then I am not sure what I will do. I then ordered a beer and waited for 9:30. I soon got a text from Ann saying 9:15 at Burger King. I tried to reply I would be there, but a few minutes late, but my phone failed to send the text for some reason. Anyone trying to save a few bucks when coming to Thailand do not do it by trying to buy a cheap phone.
I got dressed and hurried over to Burger King. I waited and waited, but no Ann. I checked my phone and realized I had turned it off for some reason. I turned it back on and I had a phone message, but I thought that I was out of minutes so I could not retrieve it. I started to look for a pay phone, but then Ann called and asked where I was. I said the BK and she said she would be right over. I keep saying for “some reason” when talking about the shortcomings of my phone. The obvious reason for all the problems I had with the phone was due to the fact it was a complete piece of shit. I would have made my experience in Thailand so much better, and I would have felt so much better personally if I would have thrown that phone as far as I could into the Chao Phrya River. It is one of the few regrets I have from my trip.
In about 10 minutes Ann crossed the street hand in hand with her boyfriend. I have to admit I was a little disappointed by this as Ann is a very pretty girl, but it all worked out very well in the end. Her boyfriend, Oat, was the coolest guy. I am glad to have another friend in Thailand. We walked to his car, and Ann explained we were meeting friends and that also we would be spending the weekend at her home. I said that sounds perfect. I had thought that Ann lived in the outskirts of Bangkok, but she lives a little farther away. I told them that I was interested in history and in World War II especially. Ann told me they had a World War II cemetery in her home town and Oat said something about a railroad. It turns out that she lives in Kanchanaburi, and in her hometown is where the Bridge over the River Kwai is. This is most excellent because this is one of the places I really wanted to see in my last week here, and now I have a guide to take me there.
I lived near a Thai neighborhood in Chicago, and I frequented this Thai restaurant a couple of blocks from my apartment. I got to be on friendly terms with the waitress. One day she told me it was her last day. She told me that she was going back to Bangkok the next day to resume her studies. I got her email and phone number. At the time I never imagined I would need it, but I figured it would at least be cool to have a Thai email pen pal. Now I am really glad I did this as she was really eager to show me around Thailand. She told me on the phone that she was going to take care of me. This was music to my ears after traveling alone for a couple of weeks.
Oat drove us to a hotel and met up with their friend’s Pat and Gift. Two really pretty school mates of Ann and Oat. Gift’s parents own this hotel and it is a really nice hotel. We get there and there are four dishes of fried rice waiting for us. Again, I am struck by the courtesy that Thai people have for each other. Both Oat and Ann clasp their hands together and bow to Gift’s mom. We started eating and Ann and Oat all of a sudden drop their silverware and start bowing again to someone behind me. I am expecting that the king of Thailand just walked behind me, but it is Gift’s father.
We leave and they tell me that we are going to a pub and have a few drinks. I am pleased by this because there is nothing better than sitting back in a relaxed atmosphere with interesting friends and drinking and talking. Instead we arrive at this huge complex of all these discos and it is absolutely packed. We get in line and the person says I cannot come in with sandals. Since I was told that we were going to a pub, I did not think to wear anything fancy and since I am traveling I am almost always in casual clothing. This was a translation problem. If they told me that we were going to a disco I would have asked in advance about what I should wear. They did not understand the difference between pub and disco. I thought I just ruined everything, but Oat tells Ann what is happening and he motions me to follow him. He says he has shoes in the back of his car. Fortunately, he did, and even more fortunate is that Oat is taller than me, which is unusual here, so his shoes fit perfectly. They are kind nice looking black shoes that do not match the rest of my casual get up, but at least they get me in.
We enter and the place is a mob scene. There are all these different dance rooms and according to Ann each room had a different style of music. They all sounded the same to me. It was all dance music with a throbbing beat, but each room’s throbbing beat was beating at maybe a little bit different rhythm. Ann asked me which music I liked the best. I told her it does not matter to me, and she laughed. I was a little disappointed as I had in mind a quiet pub where we could talk, but this was as far from that as possible, but I was trying to make the best of it. We finally got settled and I headed for the toilet. I went to the bathroom and then at the sink was one of those bathroom attendants that provide soap and towels. They go a little further here. After giving me soap the attendant handed me a hot towel. I thought this was a nice touch and began to apply it to my face. While the towel was over my face I suddenly felt hands groping my neck. I slowly and skeptically removed the towel to see who was intruding on my personal space in the men’s bathroom. It was the smiling attendant giving me a massage. If this happened in the U.S., I would have angrily pushed the guy away and gotten the hell out of there, but in this scenario I just started to crack up. Then he takes my neck and swings it one way and then the other in an effort to crack my neck. Then he starts doing karate chops down my back. By this time I am laughing hysterically. I give him a tip and head back to the table still smiling ear to ear as I am pushing my way through throngs of dancing Thai people.
Oat asks me if I want beer or whiskey. I tell him whiskey as I am a little bit burned out on beer at the moment. He orders Johnny Walker red and a server brings a whole bottle along with a bucket of ice and an assortment of mixers. He asks me for 400 baht and if this okay. I give him the money ($10) and the attendant mixes me a drink. I ask Oat if the money was for one drink. He laughs and says no it is part of the money for the whole bottle. I am not sure how much the bottle and the mixer were, but the 10$ I gave Oat was enough for all the drinks I wanted while I was there. In U.S. discos one drink can run 10$, so I would not have been surprised if it was that expensive, but then I remembered I was in Thailand. We have enough room to stand where we are, but not enough for our drinks. The neighbors next to us have a table and they see our predicament and start shuffling there drinks on their table to give us room to put ours. We thank them for their kindness and we all do a toast with them and take a big slug of our drinks together in appreciation for their nice gesture. In bars and discos in the United States you never get this type of kindness. People are all about themselves in our society and rarely look to help others in this type of situation. I remember I was in a crowded bar one time in my hometown and a friend of mine were drinking and sharing one very coveted bar stool. We took turns sitting on it. My friend went to the bathroom and I was guarding the chair. I leaned away from it to get a drink at the bar and a woman actually jumped backwards and did a flying leap with her butt landing right on my chair. I could not believe she so rudely stole my chair.
We have a few drinks and start dancing in place. A few other cute Thai girlfriends of Ann have joined us, but one by one they leave. Gift got a phone call while dancing, and as soon as she was off she excused herself. Her mom had called and requested her home. At this point it is just me, Oat, Ann, and Chuck whom is a friend of Oat’s. I look around the room and right next to us is a beautiful dark skinned Thai girl dancing. She turns around and smiles at me. I go over and in Thai ask what her name is. At first she does not understand me because my pronunciation I am sure is horrible, but as soon as she understands, she replies back in English that she is Sofia. Sofia turns back to her friend and dances. Oat and Ann prod me to get her number. I feel like I am in middle school being coaxed by friends to ask someone out. I ask for her number, she agrees, but we don’t have a pen. Ann says just add her to your phone. I say of course and take my phone out, but the battery is dead. My battery on my phone has a life expectancy of about 5 minutes and it always goes out when I need it most. I have spent half my trip charging that damn phone. Ann adds Sofia to her cell phone saying that she will text message the number to me the next day.
I spend the rest of the evening hanging out with Sofia. Usually in America when you are trying to pick up a girl at a bar your worst enemies are her friends. They see right through your intentions and do their best to interfere in order to protect their friend. In this case her friends were incredibly sweet. They all came up and asked me my name and where I was from, and if I liked Thailand. One friend named Am says in broken English when she was leaving that “I wish you good luck and have a great trip.”
At 2am the bar closes and Oat and Ann have left. They tell me I can just grab a taxi to my place easily. Sofia says she is hungry, so we walk outside and get some soup with noodles. A mangy dog starts barking behind me, and I turn to see what has got the mangy thing in such an uproar. There is a dude right behind me with an adolescent elephant; only in Thailand.
Sofia tells me she is meeting a girlfriend on the Sukomvit tomorrow and wants me to join her. I say ok. We all get in a taxi and take her and her friend Jay to their place, and then I continue in the taxi back to Kho San road. At this point the street is pretty empty. A few people are hanging out on the curb drinking whiskey. Also, a lot of stray prostitutes proposition me as I am walking back to the guesthouse. A few of them were obvious lady boys. I get to the guesthouse and it is locked. Oh no, I said, I did not know there was a guesthouse curfew. I think I can see someone, so I knock. One of the waitresses is sleeping in a little mattress with a net around it. She wakes up and unlocks the door and gives me the key and wishes me a good night.
Traveling Ted 
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